The Ripple Effect: How Practicing Self-Care Benefits Everyone in Your Life
- Tiffany Bentley
- May 24
- 5 min read
In the chaos and demands of everyday life, self-care often slips to the bottom of our priorities. For many women, especially those juggling work, caregiving, and emotional labor, taking personal time can feel like a luxury or even seem selfish. But the truth is: self-care isn’t a luxury. It’s a necessity. It lays the foundation that allows you to consistently show up for the people, roles, and responsibilities you care about.
Taking care of yourself benefits more than just you. Your energy, emotional balance, and example radiate outward, affecting loved ones, coworkers, and your larger community. Self-care is not only personal—it’s deeply relational. And boundaries? They’re not barriers; they’re acts of connection and care.
What Is Self-Care?
Self-care refers to the deliberate choices we make to protect and nurture our physical, emotional, mental, and spiritual health. That might look like going to therapy, staying hydrated, sleeping enough, moving your body in a supportive way, or slowing down when you feel emotionally spent. It also includes smaller, often unseen decisions, like stepping away from draining conversations, silencing your notifications, or saying no without justifying yourself.
The common thread is that self-care is proactive and compassionate. It means listening to your needs and responding with intention, not waiting until you’re in crisis.
Boundaries Are Self-Care in Action
Setting and honoring boundaries is one of the most empowering ways to care for yourself, and one that’s often overlooked. Boundaries are not punishments or rejections. They clarify your limits and protect your capacity. They help you teach others how to engage with you in a way that feels respectful and sustainable.
As Brené Brown explains, “Daring to set boundaries is about having the courage to love ourselves, even when we risk disappointing others” (source).
Whether it’s saying no to one more task, opting out of a draining event, or carving out time to recharge, boundaries affirm: I matter, too.
Examples of Boundaries as Self-Care:
Turning off work notifications after a certain hour.
Saying, “I’ll need to think about that,” rather than committing immediately.
Taking a true day off instead of filling it with errands.
Letting a friend or loved one know you can’t process heavy topics right now.
Practicing boundaries can bring up discomfort or guilt, especially for those who were raised to avoid conflict or prioritize harmony. But boundaries create the conditions for lasting, authentic connection, because you’re showing up fully, without self-abandonment. Want help identifying or practicing your boundaries? Learn more about how we support women through therapy.
The Benefits of Self-Care (and Boundaries) for Others
When you’re resourced and grounded, everyone around you benefits. You’re more present, emotionally steady, and effective—not only at work but also in your relationships.
This is especially true for those in caregiving or helping professions—or even those supporting a loved one through trauma recovery. Burnout and compassion fatigue don’t just affect individuals—they impact the quality of support we’re able to give. If someone you love is going through trauma therapy, here’s how you can support them without losing yourself. Research from Charles Figley (1995) on compassion fatigue highlights how chronic exposure to others’ pain, without restorative practices, can result in symptoms similar to trauma. The American Psychological Association (APA) also emphasizes that professional competence depends on tending to both emotional and physical health.
When your cup is full:
You can listen more attentively without feeling the need to fix everything.
You model healthy regulation, boundaries, and emotional awareness.
You make more thoughtful decisions and recognize when others might be struggling.
“What kind of boundary do you most need right now?”
A work boundary (like logging off at a set time)
A relationship boundary (like saying no while honoring my ne
A time boundary (like making space to rest or do nothing)
A digital boundary (like silencing notifications)
You can vote for more than one answer.
Self-Care and Your Inner Circle: What Your Family Learns From You
At home, your choices create a ripple effect, too.
Whether you're a parent, partner, or friend, how you treat yourself becomes part of the emotional tone of your relationships. Loved ones don’t just absorb what you say—they absorb how you live. If you constantly ignore your own needs, stretch yourself thin, or avoid setting limits, that becomes the norm that others may internalize.
On the other hand, when you:
Say, “I need some time to reset.”
Choose rest, even if the laundry isn’t folded.
Speak up when something doesn’t feel right
You’re teaching that caring for yourself is not just acceptable, it’s essential. That’s a lesson that benefits everyone.
Your Self-Care Impacts the Community
We tend to see self-care as personal, but it has wider implications. Tending to your well-being in consistent, meaningful ways increases the likelihood that you will:
Stay connected and engaged, instead of spiraling into burnout.
Encourage others to advocate for healthier boundaries and work norms.
Push back against expectations of overwork, perfectionism, and silent suffering, especially those placed on women.
Self-care is not about getting it perfect. It’s about permitting yourself. And when you live from that place, you help others feel free to do the same.
Practical Tip: Use a Self-Care Assessment to Tune In
Not sure where to begin? Try the Self-Care Assessment from the University at Buffalo. It’s a practical tool that helps you evaluate areas of self-care—physical, emotional, spiritual, relational, and more.
Choose one area where you feel solid and one that could use more attention.
Then implement a Micro-practice. Pick a small action from the area you want to grow in and schedule it this week. Write it on your calendar.
Example: 15 minutes alone before bed, or a walk outside with your phone on airplane mode.
Reflective Questions
What happens when I ignore my limits?
What would it look like to care for myself as thoughtfully as I care for others?
What’s one boundary I could set that would give me more room to breathe?
Want to Dig Deeper?
Here are some books and articles that explore boundaries and self-care further:
Ultimately
Self-care is not selfish, and it’s not something you have to earn. It’s the groundwork that allows you to show up with presence, kindness, and clarity. Through rest, nourishment, and boundaries, you offer better care not only to yourself but to everyone around you.
So the next time guilt creeps in, remember this: Your needs are not a problem—they’re a guide. Listen to them. Guilt doesn’t always mean you’ve done something wrong.
Sometimes it simply means you’re doing something different—stepping into your own truth. The key is to notice where your guilt is pointing: Is it guiding you back to your values, or is it rooted in old programming?
Because ultimately, Light, you are the keeper of your own knowing—no one else has that kind of power.Shine bright and keep moving forward.
About the Author
Tiffany Bentley, LCSW, is the founder of Somatic Women, a virtual therapy practice supporting women in MA, CT, RI, VT, and FL. She integrates EMDR, ACT, and somatic therapies to help women reclaim their voices, restore balance, and live with clarity.
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